“I just want a child I can connect with,” said Mrs Chang as she sat in my speech therapy room, with quiet frustration.

The fact is, if you are trying to teach a child who is not communicative, it is not the same as teaching a child who is readily articulate. If you don’t equip yourself with the know-how, both you and your child end up feeling frustrated and helpless.

I would like to share some techniques I use in my speech therapy sessions that have proven highly effective in getting children to initiate, respond and interact.

Speech therapists refer to these techniques as ‘communication temptations‘ – tempting or coaxing communication from children.


Do remember that children will interact at different levels e.g. through gestures or using ‘sign language’ and signing, making sounds, saying words or sentences, based on their ability. (They are not ‘lazy’!)

“Mrs Chang, I will summarize the main principles for ‘communication temptations’ so that it is easier for you to remember. The easier it is for you to remember, the better you can apply them in everyday activities.”

The 3 main principles to stimulate interaction in less communicative children are:

I.  Create opportunities for your child to ‘Have your say and get what you want.’ his favourite object or activity (not yours!). Help him to succeed in doing that and reward him with what he likes!

II.  Create opportunities for your child to ‘Have your say and avoid what you don’t want.’

Support her to succeed in refusing or protesting. Reward her by allowing her to avoid the undesirable object or activity!

III. Create opportunities to show your child ‘You’re smart, have your say and make things happen’.

Pretend you don’t know which object to use, where something is, what to do next, how to play etc.

Support him to help you, and show him how fun, important or useful his help is!

You now know the 3 key principles for stimulating speech!

Almost every technique your therapist will use falls under one of the 3 key principles.

You now know what to do to get your child to talk and interact with you.

As you put them into practice, you will get a better sense of the finer points of how to apply the techniques e.g. making it easy enough to interest your child, yet also challenging enough to take them to the next level.

Remember to apply the techniques with love and support for your child– they are not meant to be negative experiences.

Being able to communicate and having your say should be a positive experience!

Do share and your successes as you make the techniques a part of your life. It’s a great way to validate yourself and your child.

To your success!

P.S. I shall be giving specific examples to help make these general principles come alive for you, please come back and check this space!